I drank *the Devil* under 23 tables, I am too *intense* to die, I’m insured for acts o’ God *and* Satan! I’m a human being of the *first* GOD DAMN water, who’ll try to blow me down? They say a godzillion is the highest number there is. Well by God! I count to a godzillion […]

At our mutual place of work, I have a favourite washroom stall that I like to practise peeing into – second one from the left if you’re facing the sinks. I have a hunch that it’s your favourite stall as well and I’d like to talk to you about it. I think you need more […]

“We support free speech, but when it does infringe on other people’s rights and our school policies, then we need to take a look at that.” I love that kind of logic. You’re free as long as your thoughts are conformist and you don’t offend the majority or make them uncomfortable. Some Americans drive me […]

I’ve discovered the mecca of lame-ass banner ads, rockthevote.ca “Rock the Vote encourages young people to create positive social and political change in their lives and communities through awareness and action.” However, before you can do all that, you must get pierced and pissed off. In that order. When are we going to treat youth […]

Sitting in a meeting this week discussing a summer project in which teens are the customary victims of our marketing love, I hear these words: “we’d like to euthanize this event”. I think poor kids, but sure… them, this event and you too! Of course the word intended is youthanize, a neologism to add to […]