I’d like to apologise to the funky airflight attendant on flight BA99 last weekend. My embarrassment is over the conversation he had with two idiot Torontonians sitting behind me on the plane and the fact that I did nothing to intervene.
The conversation went something like this:
Flight attendant: I’ve 24 hours in Toronto and I’d like to do some shopping… I’m thinking of Kensington market… any other places I should go?
Idjut 1: Oh really, I used to go to Kensington years ago and you know, it’s closed on Sundays.
Lily on the thought bin: WHAT!!?? How many years ago did you go, thirty?
FA: I’m absolutely gutted! You serious?
Idjut 2: Yeah… sorry. But check out Sherway Gardens, it’s quite a posh mall. Good shopping…
Lily on the thought bin: WHAT THE FUCK!!??
FA: Hmmm, not sure I’m the mall type.
Lily on the thought bin: No shit Sherlock… anyone could look at this guy and figure that out.
FA: I’m so gutted about Kensington, I was looking forward to that all week. I’m going to check out some bars tonight anyway. Yonge street is the place to go, yeah?
Idjut 2: Totally and Richmond in the club district… excellent times.
Lily on the thought bin: For christ’s sake…
If I weren’t so tired from the 30 hour journey home, I would have spoken up and said:
1) Kensington is open on Sundays! In fact, the day you wanted to go was a Pedestrian Sunday – I hope you went! (The Huz did see the attendant in the airport and at least stopped him to tell him that.)
2) Sherway Gardens is a vapid wasteland for suburbanites who worship at the altar of lame celebrities (Coming clean: This might be a good time to shamefully admit, I love the new Fergie track Fergalicious… “My body stay vicious I be up in the gym just working on my fitness”…LOL)
3) Given your age and asymetrical ‘do (I was surprised to see someone so young attending an international flight) I’d recommend the following:
– Queen West… west west of Spadina but a few funky shops between University and Spadina still remain. Around Ossington you start getting artist-operated boutiques/galleries, vintage shops and other ecclectic goodies.
– Yorkville (good designer shopping, food, pubs – but mucho $$$$$)
– Kensington market, of course
– Urban Outfitters on Yonge between Queen and Dundas
– try a Value Village! (Bloor/Landsdowne, Queen/Carlaw)
That would be my advice – NOT Sherway fucking Gardens. Good lord.
Fellow Torontonians, any thoughts?
p.s. I’ve had a few people tell me that the comments function on my blog is either not working or asking for registration details… if you have trouble, email me lilydustbin[at]gmail[dot]com and give me the lowdown on the situation you encounter.