In Toronto we have the legend of the albino squirrel (oh, oh, oh, I’ve seen one) and everywhere else they apparently have… the crack squirrel.
In a report about Pete Doherty’s crack-addicted kitty (alleged of course, avec photo of tiny crack pipe held up to itty-bitty kitty mouth), the Sun drops the cracksteria bomb near the end:
DOHERTY’S kitten is not the first animal with addiction problems. In 2005 The Sun told how squirrels in Brixton, South London, became hooked on crack cocaine hidden by addicts in gardens.
Residents said the tufties had bloodshot eyes and were “digging desperately” in flower-beds.
In the US, crack squirrels are a recognised problem in New York and Washington DC parks.
The idea of the crack squirrel is highlarious, ridiculous and completely unfounded. On the other hand, Doherty giving crack to a kitten is not big or clever, but certainly conceivable.
Down with the crack squirrel, long live the albino squirrel and someone save Pete Doherty’s kitty!
Source of inspiration: Pete Doherty’s cat is on crack