This is how wars get started.



The following is an email exchange that I witnessed this week.

Spanning three countries and two continents, we’ve got a cry for help, a forgotten bartender, a reference to David Hasselhoff and more! It all started in the deep south.

The cast:

B – Southern belle
J – German philosopher
G – French trickster

* names have been changed to protect the identities of the guilty

Let’s begin.
[…]

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Creation of Man Turned Crime Scene



photo credit: Elizabeth Conley / The Detroit News

“In a particularly philistine and backward act, artist Edward Stross was sentenced to prison last week for his mural depicting a bare-breasted figure on a building in Roseville, Michigan, in suburban Detroit. The artist was ordered by District Judge Marco Santia to serve 30 days in jail, do two years of probation and pay a fine of $500 for his variation of Michelangelo’s “Creation of Man,” illustrating a half-naked Eve. Stross was also mandated to alter the fresco, which he painted on the outside of his art gallery in 1997.”

Michigan artist sentenced to jail over mural nudity… read more.

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Why are people dickheads?



It all started last week when mr.hotmail account emailed me at work to dutifully inform me that someone had registered a URL with a name similar to one of our artists’. It’s an ILLEGAL DOMAIN, sir dickhead plead, you must do something about it…

Not caring about the URL in the least, but somewhat suspicious/curious, I investigated the registration record and sure enough, it was mr. hotmail himself who had registered the domain. What a dick!

Stupidly, I got into a bit of a row with him and he’s now retaliated by damning me to daily dispatches of smut.

So, if you need to increase the volume of your seminal fluid by 500%, I know just the trick.

Speaking of cultural contamination, I’m no fan of Paris Hilton’s, BUT in her defense I have to say that the anal pube who posted her Blackberry’s contents online over the weekend is a colossal dickhead. Admittedly, I did feel the urge to call Vin Diesel and ask him, dude you were good in Boiler Room… what happened?

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Evidence of Canadian Winter.



canadian_winter.jpg

Geez Louise! Forget rust-proofing your car… we’re a
nation of dysfunctional denims!

Trousers and model courtesy of kungfupingu.

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We must protest, for the sake of the gay penguins.



Since we’re on the topic of penguins, I’d like to go on the record and announce my horror at a German zoo’s “effort to tempt its gay penguins to go straight“.

These gay penguins (there are 6 of them) did not choose to be homosexual and we must respect that. I know penguins are endangered and more baby penguins are a good thing, but really – can we expect to save a species on the backs of gay penguins? I can’t live with that and I can’t believe these “scientists” can sleep at night.

What’s next? Shall we send our gay penguins to camps to learn how to be “straight”? It’s already clear that some gay penguins are living double lives, “one couple even adopted a stone that they protected like an egg” – clearly they just don’t feel comfortable to be openly gay in such a hostile environment.

How long can this go on?

Ok, maybe horror is too strong a word. LOL

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